“Delight yourself in the Lord; And He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He will do it.” Psalm 37:4,5 (NASB)


When I make Him my desire and my delight, then He will give me Himself - and much, much more. More than I could ask or think. More than I deserve. More than I can take in. More than words can say.

When I was in CSI, the Lord spoke to my heart. He told me that I would be singing with Candle,(one of the music groups that traveled and ministered both children’s and early contemporary worship music), in a year. I thought it was a funny thing for Him to speak to me because I wasn’t longing to do music or even really thinking about it. I didn’t desire to work with a music team at the time. That part of my life, any musical abilities I might have, had been totally yielded, completely given over to the Lord. As far as I was concerned it was a dead issue. So, I just filed it mentally and then forgot about it.

Almost exactly a year later I happened to be walking near the front of the ranch and saw Candle’s bus pull into the entrance. As I watched there arose in me an overwhelming desire to be in Candle. Yet, as far as I knew they didn’t need another singer.

Standing right there, looking at the bus, I prayed. “Lord, if this desire is of you then please have them start another group and need another singer. If it’s not of you, just take the desire away.” I went on my way and didn’t tell anyone of the incident.

That night, at the Tuesday night meeting, Tony announced that they were starting a new group. Actually, the old group “Candle” was becoming “Silverwind”. He also said they had everyone they needed for the new Candle - except one Alto. Can you believe that? Here I was praying exactly what God was already doing. He showed me then that He would put a desire in our heart and then fulfill it. We don’t have to run from our desires. If our whole life is yielded then He will both give us godly desires and then bring them to pass. When He is our true delight and desire we can trust that the things that grow in our hearts are things He has given us. If He puts it there and we stay submitted to Him, He is the one who will bring it to pass.

Sometimes I was just so afraid to trust my own heart, but He was just so good to create a whole new heart in me. I knew from that time on that if I cared about His will, He would also be concerned for my happiness.

After a year and a half being on the road with Candle, the time came for me to move on to other things. Still the cry of my heart was always “Use my life , Lord. Use me.” In fact, it went deeper than that. Often I would cry “Use me to my utmost, or slay me. Take me home if you can’t squeeze out every drop. Every breath.” It wasn’t singing that I cared about so much. It was just everything. Every part of me.

In the middle of that prayer one day, God really nailed me. “What about right now,” He said. “Not in the future somewhere. Not when you’re perfect. Not when you’re together and all mature and feeling confident. What about right now.” So I wrote a song about wanting to be a strength. It was about not being a child anymore. I felt like I had been the weak link when I was in Candle and I didn’t want to be the weak link anymore. This song was an expression of that heart’s cry.

I was working on the ranch then, kind of floating from thing to thing. I worked on the Silverwind mailing list primarily, but when that was all caught up I would work in the bookstore or help in the kitchen or help with whatever needed to be done. In my spirit I felt like new beginnings were in the air. I even wrote it in my journal, but I didn’t have any idea what it was that God was about to do.

January 4th, 1982I’m feeling kind of restless. I know it’s only the Lord that can meet my heart…I’ve written a song that expresses my heart. I feel a change in the air - maybe just a hope for stimulation - yet I am content. At times it is a challenge to be. But fulfillment will never come from work or a particular job. It truly comes from my relationship with the Lord. Oh Lord, teach me to always have my heart set on You and on what I do.


One cold, windy day in Winter it seemed as if every place I went to work I would finish so quickly. I kept getting sent from place to place until there was finally no place else to send me. The last place I worked was the kitchen, cleaning the big walk-in refrigerator. It was so weird. Usually there was an abundance of work, more than we could get done. But there I was with no place to go. It was snowing outside when I walked out of the kitchen into the cafeteria. The lights were off and I could see snow falling all around as I looked out the windows. It was so quiet and so peaceful.

Just then, Papa Salerno, Tony’s father, walked in. Since I didn’t have anyplace else to be I asked him if he wanted to hear the song I was working on. “Sure,” he said, and we went over to the grand piano in the corner by the window. As I sang my song about being used of God the Spirit of the Lord was strong. When I finished Papa prayed for me. He prayed that God’s will would be done in my life and that God would answer my heart’s cry to be used.

When we finished I walked slowly down to the office along the orchard road, praying the whole way. I walked into the office. Lynn was so shocked to see me that she just kind of stared in amazement. She stood there holding the phone and said “It’s for you”.

It was Tony. By this time the ministry was pretty big. People just didn’t get phone calls from Tony. I could still hear his father’s prayer ringing in my ears as I listened to what he was saying. Tony was wondering if I thought I could handle the pressure of singing and traveling with Silverwind...I thought perhaps I could. I wasn’t perfect. I wasn’t so confident or mature or any of that. But God was wanting to use me “now”. If He wanted me, I must be ready.

That very afternoon I was on a plane to California.

That was the beginning of five intense years of ministry with Silverwind. Once again God had heard the cry of my heart and answered almost before I could ask, granting the desires that He himself had placed in me.

It doesn’t matter what it looks like or how it seems that men make decisions. God is in control, if you make yourself available to Him - just as you are. He will use you and glorify Himself in the process. Is there any better way to live?

Patty Gramling Forney